ic contact; asgard

[mccallmemaybe]

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[teenyoda]

I hate you, you know that? You are a serious pain in my ass.

They're a present, okay? OKAY?

[mccallmemaybe]

I don't think Lydia wants art supplies.

[teenyoda]

It's not for Lydia. Why would you think it's for Lydia?

[mccallmemaybe]

I dunno. Because she's the only girl you've bought presents for?

[teenyoda]

Who says it's for a girl?

[mccallmemaybe]

Well it can't be for me because I'm not good at art. And your dad probably doesn't want that stuff either. It sounds like you're trying to impress a girl.

[teenyoda]

Sometimes I really hate you.

[mccallmemaybe]

I'm right, aren't I? I'm totally Sherlock Holmes right now.

Who is she? Do I know her?

[teenyoda]

Still hate you.

I don't know who you know. I don't want to tell you if you're just going to tease me

[mccallmemaybe]

It would be nice to give you a taste of your own medicine.

You can't hide her from me forever.

[teenyoda]

How about I shove my foot down your throat?

I could. Maybe. You've been preoccupied lately.

[mccallmemaybe]

You're being super defensive/secretive/threatening right now. I'm not sure I like what this girl is doing to you.

[teenyoda]

Oh shut up. She's not like that. Think of Lydia.

Now think of the complete opposite of Lydia.

[mccallmemaybe]

Not a redhead?

[teenyoda]

Actually, definitely a redhead. More than Lydia. But I meant personality wise.

[mccallmemaybe]

So she's nice... and not very smart.

[teenyoda]

Scott...

Are you calling my future wife an idiot?

[mccallmemaybe]

No. But you said she was the opposite of Lydia and Lydia is really smart.

Future wife? Dude.

[teenyoda]

Personality wise, dude.

[mccallmemaybe]

So have you asked her out yet?

You haven't even told me her name. What is it?

[teenyoda]

No I haven't and you're not going to say anything about it to her. Or anyone. Ever.

It's Ra-- Wait. You're not going to go look her up, are you?

[mccallmemaybe]

What kind of best friend do you take me for?

[teenyoda]

The kind that tried to pimp me out when we were married.

[mccallmemaybe]

Fine. Don't tell me her name. I guess I'll just have to call her Not Lydia.

[teenyoda]

You'd better not. I'll shave your head and eyebrows off while you sleep.