mccallmemaybe | ic contact; asgard

[ Scott's hair is shorter, but the most noticeable difference about him is the tattoo on his arm covered by his long-sleeved shirt. Except if Allison could see it now, she might think he got it in Asgard too as well as a haircut. ]

When you were asleep, you went home, didn't you? [ Scott can see it in her face, how freshly emotional she looks from grieving over her dead mother. She never got to properly grieve here because although she knew from Stiles that her mom was going to die, it hadn't happened yet. ] It happened to me, too...

So I know what you've come here to do. [ To break him up with him, again, because she thinks he hasn't had this conversation with her back home when he has. It was painful enough the first time, so he'll stop her from trying to find the strength to do it again when he doesn't want to hear the words just as much as she doesn't want to say them. ]

It's okay. You don't have to say it again. I know. [ He knows what this is. He knows what Allison needs. Space. He'd be selfish not to give that to her.

What's most painful about this is that he cut off contact with her for months. It was probably easier to do that back home because she literally left the country. She can't leave here. In Asgard, he'll no doubt bump into her at some point, but the idea of distancing himself from her all over again...

It makes him feel truly, utterly miserable.

He wants to feel as hopeful as he did back home right after she broke up with him. Part of him still thinks they're fated to get back together, that they're destined to be with Isaac too. But his hope feels threatened by the darkness around his heart. If he lets the darkness win, it'll squash every ounce of hope he has.

He can't let it win. He has to be strong. He has to smile at Allison like this entire conversation isn't killing him so she doesn't feel guilty and change her mind, so she can let him go and concentrate on herself. ]

[ If there's one thing she can count on, it's Scott figuring out some way to make things easier for her, no matter what the situation is. Even if he hadn't gone home, even if he didn't understand why she was breaking up with him again, he would've been just like he had back home; telling her that it's okay and that he'll wait for her.

Of course, that makes her feel even worse right now, because Scott is always so generous and caring. It's not fair that she has to do this (though, really, she doesn't have to and there's a large part of her that doesn't want to). For either of them. And even though he knows what she's going to say, it still hurts more than she could even put into words. The worst part is, she has absolutely no idea who she's supposed to turn to for comfort since the one person she would usually is the one she's breaking up with.

She drops her gaze to her lap, even as she nods, and tries to figure out something else to say. With him already knowing, Allison's sort of at a loss for words. ]

How long were you home for? [ The haircut still could've happened here in Asgard, but she's not so sure anymore. ]

[ Scott can think of one person she can turn to: Isaac. After all, wasn't that what happened back home? Scott and Allison had both been busy following separate paths. He'd asked Isaac to look out for Allison and that's what he'd done whilst getting close to her at the same time. Maybe the same would happen here. Maybe (hopefully) his and Allison's paths would lead back to each other again. Until then, there's no one Scott trusts more to take care of Allison than Isaac. ]

Over five months. [ He wonders if she'll ask what happens or if she learned her lesson from asking Stiles what happened to her mom... Scott isn't ready to tell her what happened to her, Stiles and himself. He doesn't think he'll ever be ready to tell her.

Scott tries to think of something positive to share with her, to distract from her the pain... Not a lot comes to mind, but he can think of one thing to talk about. Something that might make Allison... proud, maybe. ]

I become an alpha. [ And before she gets the wrong idea: ] I didn't kill anyone... I guess I made it happen? [ Through sheer force of will. ] Deaton told me true alphas are rare, happens once in a hundred years... Apparently I'm even less normal than I thought. [ Scott smiles at Allison a little. ]

[ There are a million and one questions she has for him but right now, her sadness outweighs her curiosity about ten-fold. Perhaps later, after she's taken some space (and given him some, too, though with five extra months under his belt, she's wondering if he's moved on or not), she'll ask him. For now, though, he's safe, even without the distraction.

When he says he becomes an alpha, though, she lifts her gaze, brow furrowed in a very confused and concerned way. Which he obviously expected to happen, since he continues on pretty quickly, explaining what actually happened. And he was right; it does make her proud, even if her feelings regarding werewolves lately have been very, very jumbled up. ]

But you're alive, [ she says, not offering him a smile in return but referencing their back to back conversation in the cafeteria that one day. Lacing her fingers together, Allison slips her hands between her legs to keep herself from reaching over to touch him. ] I guess you really do have your own pack now, then, don't you? [ Of course, when Derek said that, Allison had been part of it; does that still hold true? ]

[ Scott wishes he didn't know what conversation she was referencing back to, her words from that day in the cafeteria echoing in his mind. I don't want you to be normal, I want you to be alive. It's almost painful to be reminded of that now, even though he was so thankful for her acceptance of what he was. Her reply still reminds him of days gone by, of a time when he could seize her hand like second nature, unlike now. ]

I do. [ He's always had his own pack, Derek pointed that out long before he became an Alpha. Stiles, Isaac, Lydia and of course Allison. It doesn't matter that they're broken up, or that she comes from a family of werewolf hunters. She's still a part of his pack, as long as she wants to be. ]

Pack is important. [ He wouldn't be here without his friends, as far as he's concerned. ] That's why I'll always think of you as part of mine. [ Because she is so, so important to him, regardless of whether they're a couple or not. ]

[ As if sensing Allison's sudden onslaught of tears and how desperately she wants to hold them back (though it isn't really working, not with how they flood her eyes) and longs for a distraction, Greenberg comes out from under the bed before she has a chance to respond, clawing his way up the blankets on the bed. Allison clears her throat as she glances down towards him, reaching out to give him a bit of a hand.

That's not exactly the distraction she'd been hoping for, but it's better than nothing. ]

What, um-- [ She frowns a little as she runs her hand over his tail. ] What should we do with him? [ Since she's moving out and all. ] If you want to keep him, that's fine; I can... come visit or something. [ It'd be awkward as hell, but they could do it. Or Allison would just let him go and try not to think about him too often, just like she'll try to do with Scott.

God, why didn't anyone warn her about this being so difficult? ]

[ Scott really thought he'd said the right thing. It was important to let her know how much she still meant to him, right? Except she looked even more like she was going to burst into tears at any moment so it was obviously the wrong thing to say after all, damn it.

Thankfully their kitty comes to the rescue. But thinking about what they should do with their pet feels like deciding what to do with their own child. They both love Greenberg and he's attached to both his owners. When Scott dropped Allison off at Jo's, Greenberg was whining for her. When Scott was asleep too, he was crying for both of them. ]

You should take him. [ His company would probably benefit her a lot more at the moment, something to cuddle at night. Not that Scott wouldn't like something to cuddle at night too. He thinks of another idea. ] Or we could, uh... timeshare him? You get him half the week, I get him the other half. You can take him first.

[ Scott really hates this. It's different from home. It feels like a divorce. ]

[ The funny thing is, it is important and she appreciates him saying that, but right now? It just hurts too much. Just like him saying he'd wait for her, that they would be together again. It makes her feel even worse for breaking up with him because it's a reminder that neither one of them has stopped loving the other.

Allison starts to protest when Scott says she should take Greenberg but then he comes up with a better idea, and Allison's lips almost curl up into a small, brief smile. It's gone as quickly as it'd appeared, though, as she nods in agreement. ] I'm sure it'll confuse him, but it'll be less stressful that way. [ For all of them, she hopes.

Reaching up to wipe at her eyes, Allison glances towards Scott for a moment before dropping her gaze back to Greenberg. ] I... [ She wants to apologize to him, but the words get lodged in her throat. ] I should probably get some of my stuff while I'm here. [ Since there's literally nothing except what the Gods supplied them with when they first got here in her room. ]

[ Scott really wishes that sentence starting with 'I...' had ended differently.

At least Allison won't have to carry her stuff far since her room is just down the hall, but there's so much of her things in Scott's room, it's going to take her longer than a minute to pack, as much as she might wish she could do it in a second and leave quickly. ] I'll wait outside while you pack. [ Because what else can he do? It would be weird to help her pack her things - help her pack her way out of his life - but so would watching her do it. She'd be better off doing it alone, especially when Scott suddenly feels close to tears himself. ]

C'mon, Greenberg. [ Scott picks the cat up to bring him outside for company. And before Allison might protest that he doesn't have to leave, Scott is already gone from his room, shutting the door behind him. He sits with his back against the wall beside his door, Greenberg on his lap. Scott strokes him to distract himself from the heaviness in his chest. ]

[ Allison does want to protest, wants to tell him that it's silly for him to leave his own room, but she stops herself. She can't selfishly keep him close to her when she's breaking up with him. Again. It's not right. So she just sits there and watches him scoop up their cat and then leave the room. As the door closes, the tears in her eyes threaten to spill over, her bottom lip quivering. She desperately wants to just give in and start sobbing, but she can't; she has to pull herself together and get packed as quickly as possible.

Letting out a heavy breath, Allison squeezes her eyes shut and wills herself to save the crying for later. Once she feels she's got enough control to get this done, she starts gathering her things as quickly as possible. They don't have any boxes or anything, so she piles it all into a laundry basket for ease of carrying. It fits mostly well inside of it, but it's certainly awkward and impossible to open the door with it still in her hands. So she sets the basket down on the floor near the door, casts another quick glance around the room (the last thing she'd want is for Scott to find something days from now and have to bring it back to her) before she opens the door.

As she picks up the laundry basket again, she tries not to look at Scott; if she does, she knows all those tears she's managing to keep at bay will come out like a freight train. ]

[ Scott's staring dully into space until Allison opening the door startles him into standing, surprising Greenberg who clings to Scott's chest as he suddenly straightens up. ]

Hey, that looks heavy. Let me carry it. [ Ever the gentleman, Scott pops Greenberg on top of the laundry basket and takes it from her before she can protest. She could probably carry the basket herself but Scott doesn't want to say goodbye yet, even if Allison can't look at him.

He closes the door to his room and silently starts walking Allison to her room. It's probably the most awkward walk of his life. ]

[ There's a moment's hesitation on Allison's end, surprise at how Scott just jumped up and took the basket like that, so he's a few steps ahead of her before she moves to catch up. Guilt weighs even heavier in her stomach as she glances towards Scott, a frown knitting her brow. ]

You don't have to do that, you know. [ Not that it really matters since they're pretty close to her room already. So, as she glances away again, Allison wraps her arms loosely around her middle. ] But thanks.

[ Scott wonders what Allison is referring to exactly - being nice to her? Because that's something that will never change. ] I know, but I want to.

[ He puts down the laundry basket with Greenberg on top outside Allison's door. ] I, uh... guess this is goodbye, then. [ Not really, he'll see her in a few days for his turn to look after Greenberg.

There was a kiss last time they talked about breaking up. Scott wonders if it could happen. He steps towards her, reaches up to cup her cheek and brush away a fallen tear with his thumb. ] It's gonna be okay.

[ She's not sure if it's because she just went through this before she got back or if it's because of them living together, but it's harder this time. Especially when his hand cups her cheek like that and all Allison wants to do is lean into it despite knowing that she should pull away. So instead of doing either, she just closes her eyes and stays put, trying to keep the touch from swaying her into staying with him. More than anything (except her mom still being alive and none of this even happening), Allison wants to be with him still. She doesn't want to breaking up with him again, but she knows she needs it.

She sniffles and, despite knowing she shouldn't, reaches up to set a hand on his wrist. It's a light touch, her fingers barely touching him, but it helps. A little. ] I'm so sorry, Scott. [ The words are quiet, broken, and they hurt more to say than she expected. Still, she opens her eyes again, looking up at him through the tears. ]

I'm sorry too. [ And while she may think he has nothing to apologize for, it's for what he's about to do. And what does Scott do? Give in to that gravitational pull towards her, the same pull which almost caused a kiss between them on more than one ocassion back home.

It happens fast, too fast for Scott to talk himself out of it. For him, it's been months since he kissed her. It might be months until she's ready to let him get this close again. It might be never. The kiss ends as quickly as he steals it from her, a brief push of his lips against hers and then he's yanking himself back forcefully with an almost guilty expression. Maybe kissing her would only make the break up worst for her, that's why he looks so guilty, for not holding back. ]

Sorry, I shouldn't have-- I should go. [ Before his face loses its mask of being "okay", which is already starting to slip. He promptly turns and starts walking back to his room. ]

[ To say she's surprised would be putting it mildly but had Scott not pulled away as quickly as he did, Allison probably would've ended up kissing him back. It might've even led to something more, though that would've been far worse at the end of the day.

But he pulls away, leaving Allison standing there in shock, her hand still hovering near where his wrist had been when he starts to walk away. Her brow furrows as she watches him leave, her broken heart hammering away in her chest, and tries to will herself to do something other than stand there. But the one thing she wants to do the most - to call after him or run after him - she can't do, so Allison stays put for a few more moments before the tears become too much. And then, before the sobs have a chance to escape, she spins around and grabs Greenberg as she opens the door.

The laundry basket gets more or less kicked inside, forgotten as she makes her way to the bed. She doesn't even manage to sit down before the tears get the better of her and she gives in, letting herself cry until she either has no more tears left or ends up crying herself to sleep. ]

[ Scott forces himself to keep walking and doesn't look back until he's outside his own door.

If this were a movie, he'd look back, catch Allison's eye and walk straight back over to her to kiss her long enough for her to kiss him back. If this were a movie, she'd drag him inside her room and he'd stay the night. If this were a movie with a happy ending, the following morning she'd tell him that breaking up with him was a mistake and she'd move her stuff back in.

But this isn't a movie, it's reality and it's harsh, and by the time Scott looks back, Allison is gone, the door clicking into place behind her. There's nothing Scott can do but enter his room, slump across his bed and try not to think about how Allison might be crying nearby with no one to hold her. ]

ic contact; asgard

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action; I'll tag allison in the party log for awkward shenanigans